Settling

Lie 3: Nothing better is going to come along.

What’s wrong?
If we believe this, we are . . .
acknowledging that what we have/who we are dating is bad.
welcoming problems, pain, and (quite possibly) sin into our lives.
lacking faith that God will provide.
underestimating the importance of our relationship/future marriage.

When we settle for people we do not like, who we don’t believe are godly, or who we aren’t completely smitten by, we are doing ourselves and the other individual a huge disfavor. If this guy/girl is not living an admirable Christian life, they can lead you into spiritual problems. If you are scared no one will ever be with you besides a crummy schmuck, remember, God promises to give you all you need. If the guy/girl you are dating doesn’t know that your affection is lacking, you can hurt him/her very deeply.

There are so many problems with dating someone you do not admire, respect, and treasure. Not to mention how it can affect your marriage (you end up marrying some nasty person or investing too much that should’ve been invested into your husband/wife). This list could go on and on.

What do we do?
There’s a verse that I think can really help this falsehood:

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning. James 1:17

Is the person you are dating a good and perfect gift? If not, it didn’t come from God. Don’t get me wrong, every couple has their problems; it’s expected—we are sinful! But temptation from Satan is different than trials and discipline from God. (Read verses 12-15; it’s true!) Yes, we’re sinful but God offers forgiveness and the Holy Spirit offers strength. Therefore, carefully analyze your relationship. Satan’s always looking for a way to trap us; make sure it’s not through your relationship.

So, if it’s you that someone is settling with, step it up! It doesn’t have to be that way. And if you are settling with someone, pray about it, check yourself for problems, and leave a bad relationship with faith that God will provide a new one.

God’s children are not promised bad things. On the contrary, we are given more than we could ever deserve! Remember that relationships are also a gift from God. He expects them to honor Him, and if settling with an unworthy companion is not honoring Him, it is time to fix it or leave it.

If you have any advice or thoughts on this subject, feel free to leave a comment! I am no master of relationships. I am just sharing what I have learned.